In the annals of local footy, few tales are as delightfully improbable as that of Cobey Aynsley’s cameo for Blighty’s reserves.
Aynsley, a superstar forward of Shepparton East’s Picola District Football League era, was known for kicking big bags in the northern Victoria-southern NSW competition.
On April 6, 2024, he ran it back with a crazy haul — but on this occasion, it wasn’t for the Eagles.
With the Kyabram District League season yet to start, Aynsley was seeking to scratch the football itch.
Luckily for him, Blighty’s reserves had a spare few spots for their match against Yarroweyah.
So he played. And he kicked eight goals.
However, Aynsley’s sparkling appearance wasn’t due to a fierce passion for the game, but rather an irresistible offer from his boss, who also happened to be Blighty’s president.
The deal? A sickie and a slab of tinnies in exchange for a run on the field.
“My boss is actually the president of the club and they started before us at Shepparton East the week earlier,” Aynsley said.
“I traded a box of beer and a day off work for four quarters of footy, basically.”
There were two main positives for Aynsley suiting up for the Redeyes.
For one, he brought a couple of mates from Shepparton East who laced him up in the forward line, aiding Aynsley to his eight straight kicks through the big sticks.
The second benefit was playing the “no-ACL card”, allowing him to seagull around the arc and launch laser-guided missiles in and through — a card he is no longer afforded at East.
“Being that no-one really knew me at Blighty, I played that card and sat forward for most of the day which was nice,” he said.
“It looked like it was going to be a long day; we both rolled out with 16 aside, a couple of boys got bogged on the way there, but the boys actually played well and so did Yarroweyah.
“It was a good day and I just got on the end of ‘em mate.”
Aynsley didn’t just play that day; he dominated.
The extraordinary display was the only game he played for Blighty all season, yet it was enough to carve his name into club history.
With the Redeyes’ season now done and dusted, Aynsley’s eight goals against Yarroweyah left him as the side’s leading goal-kicker for the whole 2024 PDFL campaign.
Talk about making a mark with a bang, not a whimper.
His swashbuckling day out at Blighty may well be the last goal-kicking award Aynsley will add to his cabinet, but it certainly wasn’t his first rodeo.
The seasoned forward obliterated the field during the 2016 PDFL campaign with Shepparton East, drilling a whopping 106 goals as the Eagles swooped on a premiership and Aynsley became the toast of the town by kicking four in the final.
He’s undoubtedly yellow and blue through and through, but Aynsley had nothing but niceties reserved for the Redeyes after his cameo up-state.
“It was certainly one of the most enjoyable days,” he said.
“I like meeting new people and it was just good to get across and give them a hand.
“They were pretty appreciative and very welcoming, it was a really good club — not that I expected it not to be. From a fun point of view it was really good.”
Aynsley’s clearly chuffed looking back on his Redeyes debut.
But when presentation nights rolls around, will he head to Blighty to pick up his award?
“If the boss puts on the beers I’ll wander out there,” he said with a chortle.
“It would actually be good to catch up with them, it was good day out there ... so I wouldn’t mind heading over for a beer with the boys.
“Hopefully they can pick up some numbers for next year — I’m currently retired, so I certainly can’t help them out.”
Aynsley has ‘copped a blighty’ in more ways than one during his footy career.
According to the man himself, he’s “had no ACL for about five years, so (I) have just been running around in the twos in straight lines”.
Now he’s booked in for surgery to mend his ACL and a broken wrist, the last tale — delightfully improbable or otherwise — may have been regaled in Aynsley’s eyes.
“I reckon that’ll call it — I won’t have to worry about footy ever again, I think.”